Cell phone photos get better every year. It’s great to capture every day moments and loved ones, but we’ve all seen what happens when people take this too far. Musicians can only see hands holding up phones during their concerts. A beautiful dinner goes cold because it needed its own photo shoot before it could be enjoyed. The absolute worst, and one that we can never get back, is a wedding ceremony when every guest is on their phone instead of being there for their couple, who loves them so much that they invited them to one of the biggest days of their lives. Here’s why you should have an unplugged ceremony and how you can plan and make it your own.

What happens during a ceremony when guests use their phones:

I’ve seen it all as a wedding photographer: heartfelt ceremonies where there wasn’t a dry eye in the crowd, views for miles in every direction, intimate weddings with few guests and large weddings with crowds filled of family and loved ones. I’ve seen ceremonies where every person is fully present in the moment and will remember fondly the personalized vows and can laugh with everyone else when there’s a light moment.

Unfortunately, I’ve also seen ceremonies when every person has their phone in front of their face, in the aisle, and above heads, just to get the shot. There’s tension in the air as people try to sneak closer and get to the front. Everyone is on edge because people are constantly moving and getting in their view. Everyone wants to photograph the bride walking down the aisle and the kiss, so in those moments no one is settled. I’ve had an aunt follow me around for an entire ceremony with her point-and-shoot camera held over my shoulder so she can get the same photos as me.

Those weddings are heartbreaking for everyone involved. The guests aren’t getting the full experience. They have snapshots to look back on, but they can’t replace the memories. The photographers work extra hard to capture your ceremony because no one wants cell phones in their albums. Worst of all, it’s heartbreaking for the couple. You invite every person to your wedding so they can celebrate your love and help you start a new chapter in your life. How can they do that from behind a screen?

What happens during an unplugged ceremony:

Unplugged ceremonies let guests know that cell phone use is not permitted for that portion of the day. This mainly means no taking pictures or staring at their screens instead of at you.

When there’s the expectation of an unplugged ceremony, the atmosphere completely changes. The couple trusts the photographer to capture the moment. They let everyone else know, so there is no need to compete or worry. Instead of stressing about how to get a better photo or when the best moment to take a picture is, they can focus on you and your love.

Everyone is smiling, holding hands, and being present in the moment. After the ceremony, they can laugh and cry about specific things you said or did to make your ceremony special and unique to you. They’ll remember them because they were fully paying attention, and they’ll love every moment.

Which ceremony would you rather have?

How to plan the best unplugged ceremony:

If you think an unplugged ceremony sounds as awesome as it is, here are a few tips to help you plan it.

1. Put it in the invitations

Set the expectation up front that you will have an unplugged ceremony, and define it for them. Mention that it’s important to you that they are fully present in the moment and that your photographer will capture the moment for everyone, so you’d love it if they could put their phones away and keep them away until the ceremony is done. Photos during the reception are always allowed and encouraged!

2. Assure your family that they will see the photos

Grandmas are sometimes paranoid that you’ll never send them the photos. As a photographer, I try to talk to every important family member and assure them that they will see the photos and they can trust me to capture the day for you. It helps if you let them know that you can’t wait to share the photos and relive the day with them. Not only will they cry of happiness at the thought, but they’ll smile at your photographers all day because they’re so excited.

3. Use a sign and have the officiant remind them

Even if you put it in the invitations, sometimes guests get excited and forget! Use gentle reminders such as a sign at the entrance or the officiant kindly telling everyone before the ceremony officially starts. They can be beautiful additions that your guests will love and respect, and they will be fresh on their minds before you walk down the aisle.

4. Give them something else to do with their hands

If they have something else to do with their hands, guests will be less likely to pull out their cellphones. Consider providing a light snack such as popcorn for guests to munch on or a pamphlet with your love story and fun details in it. Additionally, you can hand out confetti or bubbles that you want them to use during the recessional that the need to hold onto throughout the ceremony. Alex and Sawyer gave out paper airplanes for their guests to throw because they symbolized all their travels together. Make it your own!

5. The best way is to just tell them that it’s important to you

This is your day. If something is important to you, your guests will respect it. Who wants to disappoint the bride and groom on their own wedding day? If you make it clear that you want your guests to enjoy the day and be fully present, the people that love you will do it. All you have to do is ask.

Check out a recent wedding that used these tips here!

Want to learn more about the journey to having a great wedding? Check out Why You Need to Do an Engagement Session with Your Wedding Photographer.

Learn Why I Include Second Shooters in Every Wedding Package!

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